Global, Financial & Business News for City Professionals

'Sickly' Euro Drafts Last Will and Testament

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The 10 Funniest Vandalised Signs

Mervyn King Even Worse Than Previously Thought

Speakeasy

Unemployment Falls 'Though Everything Else Remains Truly Awful'

Against the backdrop of a faltering euro, slashed growth forecasts and John Terry being called up to the England squad, unemployment has fallen by nearly 45,000, triggering a baby to smile in Newcastle.
Crowds Gather To Touch German Growth

Vast crowds have gathered after reports of surging economic growth in Germany forced ratings agencies to upgrade the German economy from veiny to muscular.
Joey Barton To Oversee Greek Election Crisis

Greece has appointed Queens Park Rangers midfielder Joey Barton as an election mediator as the country finalises preparations for its relegation to the third world.
The 15 Greatest Local Newspaper Stories

We can't believe these stories didn't make the national headlines...
JP Morgan Blames Huge Loss On Human Beings

JP Morgan says it is “confronting the uncomfortable possibility” that human beings could be to blame for the gigantic hole that has appeared in its accounts.
Diamond: ‘Will Someone Please Hack My Phone?’

Bob Diamond has revealed how he cried himself to sleep after being deemed “just not interesting enough” to have his voice messages intercepted by News International’s most unscrupulous journalists.
Greece Tries To Organise Boozy Party In Brewery

Concerns are growing after Greece announced plans to host a drinks party in a brewery.
The 8 Silliest Things Asked Online

You have to wonder why these people thought posting these questions on the internet was a good idea. (Though, we're not complaining they did...)