The Oxford English Dictionary defines the word comedian as “An entertainer who tells jokes, adopts a comic persona, or acts in a manner intended to make an audience laugh” and boy oh boy have they nailed it. I don’t want to sound like a shill to big words but that really is top-notch stuff.
That’s where it all started for me. Much like many young boys, I used to read the dictionary before bed to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up but nothing seemed to fit!
Accountant? What am I, an adrenaline junkie?? Architect? Scared of heights. Archaeologist? Scared of tiny brushes.
I thought I was destined for a life of unemployment, ready to give up after Coast Guard but then suddenly, out of nowhere, there it was, staring me in the face like a man in a staring contest… COMEDIAN. Now we’re talking.
Jonny Woolley
I AM AN IDIOT
Proudly. Always have been, always will be. No matter how many times I read the dictionary, I just can’t keep it all in. I figure if you read the dictionary enough it’s a safe bet you can work out what’s going on in every other book. It’s like flat pack literature.
The reason I’m telling you this is that being an idiot is the reason for my first gig. I was studying at university (which one? I’ll never tell) and had gotten myself involved in student politics (idiot.) This resulted in me being elected as Vice President of the Guildhall School of Music & Drama Students’ Union.
The silver lining of this tragic tale is that the SU organises all the events for Freshers’ Week and Idiot Angelone decided it would be a great idea to put on a comedy night. But who should compere the show? Me, a boy who has not once ever performed on a comedy night or even done anything remotely similar.
Nonetheless, that turned out to be my first gig, in front of 300 peers with no prepared jokes. Pure idiocy.
Jonny Woolley
AWARD-LOSING COMEDIAN
In 2022, I took my first solo show to the Edinburgh Fringe. I worked on my show harder than I’d ever worked on anything (realistically still not that hard, it’s just saying words) and was excited to see what the whole world thought.
My favourite thing about the Fringe that year was getting to act like a full-time comedian. I absolutely wasn’t at that point but for that one lovely month I got to feel like my whole life revolved around my favourite thing.
It went brilliantly and I felt like I’d arrived at the place I knew I belonged. This culminated in getting nominated for Best Newcomer at the Edinburgh Comedy Awards. Lots of comedians say they aren’t interested in awards and the audience response in the room is what they really care about. This is a crock of nonsense that I myself have spewed on many occasions. I maybe even believed it, but the overwhelming joy and relief I felt when I got nominated really showed me for the ambitious narcissist I am (and I hope everyone is) deep down. It’s just so heartening to have someone say “Hey, you’re doing good stuff, we see that and we appreciate you.”
In the end I didn’t win, haven’t won anything ever and can now revert to acting like a heightened being who worries not about critical acclaim. Namaste.
SCARY STUFF
When I was young I had extreme anxiety. I still do and I’m working on getting it considered alongside Snowboarding at the Winter X Games but until Tony Hawk responds to my DMs, it’s just a vibe. Watch this space.
I would sprint out of classrooms screaming, I once punched my primary school principal (take that Mrs McGuckian) and at its worst, my anxiety would cause me to hallucinate.
The first time I can remember this happening was while trying to get to sleep on a residential course for violinists (legend); I had horrifying visions of the room filling with people pointing at me and laughing.
The hallucinations recur every so often and sometimes I think this is why I’m a comedian. Getting up and reliving the most terrifying moments of my life in an attempt to reclaim them in a positive way.
If you’d like to be part of my trauma response, my new tour starts really soon or maybe it’s already started depending on the publishing date. Either way you should come watch.
Tickets at vittorioangelone.com
