Exciting news from Sloane Square: Indian restaurant Kutir, Chelsea’s finest import since Didier Drogba, is running a special seafood menu until the end of August – and, as you’d imagine, it’s good enough to turn vegetarians pesca.

Simply existing in Kutir is a pleasurable experience. The beautiful grass-green interior and handsome furnishings makes you feel like you’re sat in the drawing room of an elderly duchess of exquisite taste who’s just returned from a summer holiday in the Indian countryside. (‘Kutir’ means ‘cottage’ in Sanskrit, and the vibe is duly homely, albeit the Belgravian townhouse equivalent.)

However, while it would be delightful to spend an afternoon here digesting nothing but a good book, a) the restaurant won’t be thrilled with this policy, and b) once you get a whiff of the smells emanating from the kitchen, you’ll be using the pages as a napkin.

Chickpeas! Since when have chickpeas tasted this good?

(It should be noted: Kutir provides its own napkins. Using literature won’t be necessary. Books are for readin’, not for feedin’.)

Head chef Rohit Ghai won a Michelin star at Jamavar, and previously presided over the mighty Gymkhana, so you can basically pick a dish at random off the menu and be assured of one of the finest Indian meals of your life. However that would rather defeat the point of this article, and be awfully shortsighted of you (come back in September and try the other stuff!) so let’s assume you go for the Jaltarang menu – aka ‘from the sea’.

A visual sample...

You will not be disappointed. Soft shell crab with chickpeas, coconut, curry leaf and tomato is a crispy, crunchy treat, notable not just for the detectability of the crab (kinda take that as a given) but the remarkable moreishness of the chickpeas. Chickpeas! Since when have chickpeas tasted this good? I must write a note of apology to my vegan friends.

Hand-dived Scottish scallops with aubergine fritters and mustard is a delicious little concoction, the scallop sitting atop the fritter, plump, soft and tantalising, begging you to scoff it down in one. (Don’t scoff. Kutir is too refined for scoffing. Likewise chomping, slurping, and guzzling. Nibble, ideally, chew if you must. It’s not just a sophistication thing – food this good should be enjoyed luxuriously, not gobbled down as quickly as possible.) (Gobbled is also a no-go.)

Things reach a climax with the Coriander Scottish lobster

Things reach a climax with the Coriander Scottish lobster, served with Kutir kaali dal, rice and flatbreads – the classic stick-a-little-bit-of-everything-on-your-plate that marks out every Indian from Brixton to Brick Lane. Once you’ve finished, you’ll also recognise the if-I-eat-another-mouthful-I-might-literally-explode-oh-hello-pudding sensation. Both massively high-end versions thereof, but relatable nonetheless.

The five-course menu is an absolute bargain at £55pp. Book an evening (or an afternoon off) in the coming weeks and go experience for yourself, while there’s still time.

Jaltarang menu

  • Soft Shell Crab with chickpeas, coconut, curry leaf and tomato
  • Hand-dived Scottish scallops with aubergine fritters and mustard
  • Prawns with mustard, mooli and Salty Fingers
  • Coriander Scottish Lobster with black pepper, cumin and todi vinegar (served with Kutir kaali dal, rice and flatbreads)
  • Chocolate with banana, Valrhona chocolate crisps and chilli // Mango Cassata with cranberry, pistachio and pink peppercorns

For more info, see Kutir